The first time I ever went to counseling was my freshman year of college. I remember looking around me as I walked into the building wondering if people knew I was going there for the counseling center. Wondering what people would think of me and if they knew that I needed to see a counselor. If they would assume I have an issue or if something happened to me that I needed to work through. It didn’t matter that I was being proactive in pursuing my mental health, every time I walked into that building I was terrified of the labels that would be put on me by the people who knew that I was broken enough to need a counselors help.
Fast forward to when I was accepted to the World Race. They welcomed me to the team, and then asked me to complete 6-8 counseling sessions before June, and told me if I chose not to, I would be choosing not to participate in the race This was absolutely no issue for me at all. In fact, I was excited that I finally had something pushing me to find a counselor in Salem again. I had been wanting to go back for a while, but kept putting if off simply because I didn’t want to put in the effort of searching for someone in network with my insurance.
After being told that I was expected to seek counseling for the race, I was also told not to look at it negatively. I had an encouraging conversation about how it wasn’t a bad thing and I shouldn’t feel ashamed that this was being requested of me. I wasn’t feeling negative about it at all and yet I was still having the conversation meant to ease any worries. After telling a couple people I had a counseling appointment and seeing their face as they asked me “why” I realized the negative stigma was still there. That got me thinking.. I had gotten over my fear of the labels because I realized how wonderful and helpful it was for me to be there, but why was I even afraid in the first place?
I believe that we all have wounds, we’re all broken in one way or another. And yet, culture still leads us to believe we need to have it all together. We still hide our brokenness from each other and we all put on masks so that on the outside we appear perfect. We know that everyone else around us has their struggles and their hardships. People say it all the time. Songs sing it, books tell us, even the Bible tells us. I could quote countless sources that speak of the brokenness which we all possess… so why then do we still believe that we need to fake it til we make it? And the question that’s really been bothering me recently; why is there such a negative stigma around seeking counseling and making a positive step toward emotional and spiritual health?
I don’t know if I’ll ever really understand why, but one thing I do know: I saw a counselor and it was one of the most beneficial things I’ve done. Every week I was excited about stepping into my counselors office. It truly was something I looked forward to, and now is something I miss. I hope that by sharing this, I’m making a step toward breaking the negative stigma around counseling and encouraging others to celebrate with those seeking health and finding the beauty in the fact that we live in a world where our God cares enough about us that He created a profession to help us find joy amidst the brokenness. Yes, this world is broken and awful things happen, but God never expects us to cope with things alone. He is God with us and He also surrounds us with people who are meant to walk with us through the hard things. Professional or not. So, if you feel broken and afraid of needing help, know that you’re not alone. You’re not more broken than anyone else because your brokenness leads you to counseling. You’re not any less worthy of the Father’s love. You’re beautiful and strong and deeply loved.
Very well stated!! I felt the same way when I first started counseling and sometimes still find myself ashamed of telling people. I’m seeing a counselor and will be going back to her when we get back as well.
That’s awesome Niecey!! I so wish I could go back to the same counselor I was just with but unfortunately I most likely won’t be living in the same area. I’ll pray the shame stays away and peace replaces it.
I wish Heather could see this! I’m glad this was a requirement of the World race, to me
that means they care about you! And you passed!! A sound mind and body to start your
adventure.
I’m so glad you wrote about your personal experience of how counseling has helped you. This will encourage others to get the help they need, too. I grew up in a generation that viewed counseling as only being necessary for ‘crazy’ people. I remember hearing ‘don’t air your dirty laundry in front of others.’ It took 30 years to seek the help I should have gotten to deal with the losses of my grandmother and little brother when I was a teenager. Life would have been so much better had I dealt with that grief sooner. Little did I know that I made a lot of bad decisions because of the lies I believed as a result of those deaths. Now I am a counselor and I love helping people be set free from lies, fears and negative beliefs and learn healthier ways of relating.
and I still go to counseling from time to time as needed!