The Next Right Thing

I’m home and it’s weird. When I was first told that I was going home I got excited. I had been struggling on the field and I was really missing home. I was excited to be reunited with friends and family. Now, I’m here and my heart is confused. The weight of everything is hitting me. 

I was abruptly torn away from my community and in a matter of hours everything in my life changed. Now, I’m left with a heartache I didn’t expect and about a million and one questions. What’s next? Is the race just over now? Am I putting my life on hold until this all blows over and they send us back to the field? Should I settle and find a job and move on with my life? What happens to all the money I fundraised? How do I incorporate what I’ve learned with my race community into home life? 

So many questions are constantly running through my mind and it’s honestly a little exhausting. I think the biggest question though is “What’s next?” And I’m pretty sure I found my answer from watching Frozen 2 on the plane ride home… They kept talking about the next right thing when the future is so unknown. At that point, the next right thing was for me to go home and rest, be with family. The best thing for me right now is to take some time at home to rest and process what the heck just happened. I don’t know for how long, but I don’t need to know. I can take it one day and one step at a time. 

I also realized it’s not just those of us returning from the World Race unexpectedly who have a million questions. In fact, I realized it’s a very normal thing in life to have questions and for the future to be unknown. I believe what God wants us to do, is give up control. Allow Him to lead and rest in His goodness and promises. We don’t need to have all the answers, we just need to do the next right thing, and that can be as simple as what to do today and let go of trying to plan out our whole future. 

I’m going to keep asking God “what do you have for me today?” And I’m going to trust that He will lead my steps. I still have questions that don’t have answers, but I’m not sure they need to be answered. God’s goodness does not change with any of those questions or answers. God’s goodness is steady and constant even when everything seems confusing and unsteady. That’s what I’m holding on to right now. I know in my heart that I can trust God and when I find myself worrying about what I don’t know, I’ll stop and ask myself what I do know. I’ll stop and redirect my thoughts to what is true. I’ll remember that I’ve had an incredible trip and I’ve learned a lot and made some great memories. I’ll remember that God has been taking care of me for 23 years and He’s not going to stop now. I’ll remember that God is consistent and never-changing. I’ll remember that I am His daughter. I’ll remember that God is going before me and He will never leave or forsake me.